Tag Archives: anxiety

Be kind

I don’t understand how life works.
One minute, I’m pouring myself coffee
thinking of my crumbling world.
The next, a man places a cup of yogurt next to my coffee.
For you, he said before walking away.
It took all I had in me not to cry right then and there.
I know it seems trivial.
Silly to think, it’s just a cup of yogurt.
But that one small gesture,
It meant the world to me this morning.
There’s kindness left.


If I could I’d cut
Pieces of the past
And watch them fall
Like paper to the floor
And then walk past
I’d wite-out and scratch out
Nights where I passed out
If I had my way
I’d erase all the mistakes
I’d start fresh
With whatever’s left


I have words about love
But there’s a dark cloud above
Rain’s about to come
Why write them today
When they’ll just be washed away

Breathe deep

It’s really hard
To keep it all inside
Breathe deep
And just swallow it
Blink it away
And bite my lip to
Push it back
All energy spent
Playing pretend
Trying not to crash
Trying not to drown
Existing but not living
Reality is really not
My forte
Mistake after mistake
Stagnant and afraid
Spinning like a top
Spiraling down
Worn and torn
Insides bleed out
Soul evaporates
Inhale emptiness
Feels like nothing

The edge

Past the point of being sought after
Heading towards the flat line
My pen is destined to write on
The sun’s been swallowed
And in darkness I roam
The wind’s hurrying me along
Right up to the edge
Of night and space
And something I can’t quite make
And I want to race
Down these invisible steps
To see what’s next

My Faults

I wonder if I’m worth more
Than the collection of all my faults
If I’ll ever be more than a liability
More than mistakes and plans I thwart
I wonder if people see me or
The shadows I danced with
I wonder if I’ll stop pretending to be a good girl
Find a medium and accept what I was made for
Drape the black slinky dress
Learn to dangle on the key chain and
Enjoy the rides others take
I wonder if I can tell the truth
Or if I’m just a series of lies
I wonder if people see how ugly I feel
Or just the mask I colored on
I wonder if I’ll ever know for real
Who the real me is
Because, it can’t just be this.
Can it?